Characters I Meet While Commuting

I haven't blathered about the folk I meet whilst commuting to work for awhile so it is time. I almost did last week on my first day back from vacation, I was cranky about going back to work and everyone seemed to annoy the heck out of me. Not wanting excessive negativity to ruin my return to work I tried to focus on less annoying things.

Today was a different matter.

So, who annoyed me while on the GO Train and the Subway?

Cranky Man

Apparently this gentleman who always waits on the platform with me was unhappy that the people in front of him did NOT shove those in front out of the way to allow him on the train as quickly as he wanted to get on. Sane people would ask . . . who cares? There were seats for all, he'd be on the train. Apparently he cared. He was very angry. He muttered rather expressive words about those in front who didn't shove onto the train. As he sat down across the aisle from me the muttering became quite audible cursing. The rest of the gentlefolk on the train gave him looks and he hid behind his paper.

Note to angry man - move to Japan where they have people who's job it is to shove commuters onto the train.

The Medical Student

I think hope this guy was a medical student. In a loud voice he shared details of an operation gone wrong with his colleague beside him. At least I think it was an operation gone wrong based upon the conversation. When I heard 'I never knew it could spurt blood like that. I think I will have to buy new shoes now!' I was so grossed out that I moved.

The Hyena

This woman has the most annoying laugh I have ever heard in my life and I have heard my share of 'em (especially last night at our drinks class!) Why, oh why are annoying laughs never quiet? Why must they wash over your senses over and over again until you just want to jump out of your seat and bash the offending giggler over the noggin with your briefcase.

Hmmm . . . that was aggressive.

The Daredevil

She was my favourite. My mother always told me not to laugh at another's misfortune but I am afraid to admit I laughed out loud at this one's misfortune. The subway chimes when the doors are closing. There are those who surely must be on the cusp of closing a $ 5 billion deal within seconds who can't wait the two minutes for the next train and thus feel the need to rush the doors and try and squeeze on before they close. This one was cutting it close. She was on the stairs when the chimes rang, she looked at the doors. She started to run. Not quickly enough because the doors thudded shut in front of her face.

Unfortunately ( you KNEW that was coming didn't you?) her purse, propelled by the force of her run, had actually swung on to the train prior to the doors shutting. She hung onto the offending purse while we who were on the train smiled as it hung down from the closed doors. When the train raced off it was pulled from her hands. We who were on the train burst out laughing. I know it is wrong, wrong, wrong to laugh at someone else's bad luck but this wasn't bad luck at all. This was stupid behaviour and someone finally getting what was coming to them. I guess it is OK to laugh at that.

At the next stop the train stopped, the doors opened and the purse fell to the floor. A kindly lady offered to get off with the purse and to wait for the next train to see if Daredevil was on it. I must be evil, I would have gone to Pottery Barn.

The Lurker

This fellow is a bizarre one. I am familiar with those who have no sense of personal space. For those who wonder - my sense of personal space is huge, yards in fact, and I'd appreciate it if you refrained from entering the space without my expressed permission. Anyway, I digress. This twit decided it was fine to join in a conversation I was quietly having with a colleague about another colleague. Did he know any of the people? NO! Did he feel the need to add to the conversation? YES!

Even in the face of my well-documented 'looks' he continued to join in the conversation. What is up with that?

There. I feel much better now that I have grumbled a bit. Thank you Typepad, you are far cheaper than therapy or Prozac.

I can get back to my Harry Potter pre-read before book # 7 is delivered to my door Saturday morning. 

Comments

[Robert]

I never realised until now how universal the commuting experience is.

Over the years, and in various cities I have encountered characters very similar to the ones you describe, though I would like to add a few more to your selection:

1) The smelly businessman - looks good in his suit, but stinks to high heaven.

2) The crazy old guy/gal - sits on a seat by himself, muttering, cackling, occasionally swearing to himself (this is VERY common on buses in Dublin).

3) The indecisive traveller - the idiot who stands just inside the train door, or on the platform in the way of everyone else, or at the top or bottom of escalators, in the entrance to the elevators, etc tormented by indecision about whether to get on or off whatever form of transport is in front/behind of them but won't move out of the way to allow others access.