March Searches

I am woefully late with this. So much has been happening that I constantly have to push this back . . . Yesterday I had an e-mail from a friend asking me if I had forgotten. That was all the trigger I needed.

My long time readers of my daily drivel will know that I have a fascination with how folks arrive at my blog. If you should happen to come upon a little thing called my life - send it back. Apparently I've lost it.

Typepad has a neat feature that allows me to track how people arrive here. Lots of folks arrive here from my posts at the slowtravel website, others from links on friend's blogs, the rest through internet searches.

Here is a list of some of the phrases that people typed into a search engine, pushed return, and ended up on this site in March. More often than not they were to leave disappointed because the blog didn't have what they were looking for. You have to admit - after 838 posts there are quite a few combinations of phrases here and google searches them all.

The change in search terms was another indication that the seasons were a'changing. There were fewer searches for stews and roasts . . . asparagus, ice cream and grilling started to crop up. Don't worry - there will be no need to ever search for Jerry in a thong.

Here is a selection of the search phrases that people typed into google, pushed 'google search' and ended up here. Poor souls. Most were sadly disappointed.

russıa nudıs beach

Honestly. I am always amazed at the folks who think that this is 'that' type of blog. You will find no information about nudist beaches here. I have been on one in my life and was burned in an uncomfortable area. I'll wear a full body suit in the future, thank you very much. Besides nudist beaches, particularly in Russia, are overrated . . . who needs to witness a 89 year old, 378 lb woman squeezed into a thong made of dental floss and a band aid. There's an image for you. Happy sleeping tonight!

I have store bought gnocchi what do I do with them

I assume that 'eat them' is too complex an answer for you . . .

Gail Hecko

These ones make me wonder. Is this Gail 'googling' herself to see how popular she is? Somehow I doubt it. Gail is one of the nicest, sweetest, and unassuming women I know - she wouldn't be googling herself. I can only imagine that it is someone who is thinking of taking one of her tours.

If so . . . sign up now. Do not wait. gailsgreatescapes.com - you will have the best week in Tuscany - EVER!

In 15th century England what color was believed to be a fever reducer?

One wonders - who really cares? Is this a rogue history trying to expand the curriculum? A really bad medical school trying to teach non-invasive techniques?

By the way, the answer is red.

How is wearing red to reduce your fever working for you? I'll take a Benylin  . . .

thoughts on vegetables

What was this person looking for? Vegetables are healthy? Vegetables come in a variety of colours? I am amazed at how little people, want to think for themselves. if you can't come up with your own thoughts on vegetables you have no business at all goggling about on the net to try and copy other folks' thoughts.

why do people think canada has winter all year long

Really? Because it is freaking cold here! Dear lord, it sure FEELS as if we have winter all year long.

rotten banana cake

Sure the bananas have gotten ripe prior to being used in a banana cake but there is nothing appetizing about a 'rotten' banana cake. I doubt that anyone would want to each this creation. I know that I wouldn't. Cooking isn't that unlike other things - marketing is key.

things to do with pork loins

Am I the only one who thinks this sounds rude? I know my mind is well into the gutter but this sounds 'off' to me.

things to do with a pork loin

Another dirty bird out there.

I bought a cheese from Liquor Barn a few years ago that had a green tint to it.  I would like to identify it

Why? At first I assumed that this was a St Patrick's posting (remember, these are from March). Then I thought - 'you let your cheese go bad you big goof!' Now we all know - do not buy cheese at Liquor Barn. That isjust good advice - buy your hooch there, get the cheese at Palma's house of cheddar.

unpleasant smelling pancetta

It never ceases to amaze me how many folks google about food that has clearly gone over the edge of freshness. As a generalrule, if it isn't blue cheese you're looking at, if it reeks to high heaven, it isn't good and should be place in the garburator immediately.

fat man

Again with the hurtful comments. Go back and read my Susan Boyle rant you cruel beast.

elderly man rants

Of course this is fun. I love ranting about elderly folks - especially when they drive cars the size of the Queen Mary . . . Then I got nervous . . . was I the elderly man being googled about? Suddenly it is not longer funny and I need to go and lay down.

aborzio rice and inflammation

I've yet to hear of anyone who gets inflamed from a good risotto (although apparently pork loins will do it for you - sorry, I couldn't resist). Unless the inflammation is a euphemism for fat. Sure, a steady diet of risotto will inflameyour waistline something crazy. Mind you, so will a case of moon pies and a Dr. Pepper.

negative thoughts about steven harper

YEAH! Another month has gone by and another negative comment about 'Harpie'. All is right with my world . . . it really is!

Comments

[Annie]

Maybe it's just me, but "thoughts on vegetables" gives me a lofty Zen kinda feeling.

"Thoughts on pork loins" brings me right back down to earth. :)

Love your "how did I get here" posts!

[Jerry]

Thanks Annie - not too zen generally, are they? *smile* It is clear that folks out there are far more twisted than Kendall and I! LOL Thank goodness.

[sandi@ the whistlestop cafe]

I am going to have to get more creative with my late night searches.

This is Jerry at his best!

[sandrac]

These always make me laugh out loud....and then, I begin to worry. What are these people planning to do with their pork loins? And who buys cheese at the Liquor Barn?

But at least I'm not the only one who suspects Canada has winter all year long!!!

[Jerry]

Sandi - I DARE you! LOL

I have been with you on that one for some time Sandra.

[Marcia]

Canada doesn't have winter all year long? LOL, and thanks for these musings, easier to read pre-lunch than the yummy food pics.

[Kayte]

I have typepad, too, and I am always amazed at how people end up on my site...my favorite has to be Sexy Grandma getting out of the shower...all this from Grandma's Kitchen Table...LOL LOL.

[Jerry]

Is that how YOU remember Marcia? I can't believe that you would have lived here as long as you did if winter lasted forever.

Oh my Kayte - that sure made me laugh! Were photos involved? Who knew that you had that type of a blog?